I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
