i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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