At least make sure they are 18
Why
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
