You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
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So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
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Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.