Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I think I just sharted jello shots
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
