i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
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