Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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