She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
