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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Alcohol?

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Sex with a fat chick.

  Fav 16 1181 1881

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  you goin out tonight?

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  who is this.

  (302): View more from Delaware

  your orgasm for tonight

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?

  Fav 14 1523 1961

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?

  Fav 13 986 1467

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (408): View more from California

  You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.

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• (845): View more from New York

  From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.

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• (831): View more from California

  Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!

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• (518): View more from New York

  I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..

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