Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
