The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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