used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
