I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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