Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
