I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
