the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
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