Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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