Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize