I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
