She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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