IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
