yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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