I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
