This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face