even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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