Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
