K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i want to fuck
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it's pretty self explanatory
ugly people sure do ruin things
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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