I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
