but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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