Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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