That's intense
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
