Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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