you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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