do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize