Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
