As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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