i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
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It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
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Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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