Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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