He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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