What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
