You work out of a Hotel?
I cockslap morals
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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