so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Little spoons don't ask big questions
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
