Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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