There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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