Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
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It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
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He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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