she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
