Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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