I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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