thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize