I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
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I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
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I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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